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Sometimes I think about Philip Seymour Hoffman, and what a useless loss his death was. So many people have been lost to opiate addiction, specifically after turning to heroin or black market pills when they can no longer refill their prescriptions. Demi Lovato almost died a year ago after taking pills from Mexico. We know what she took because her a-hole dealer talked to TMZ about it. She’d been sober from alcohol for years but she had a slip and overdosed. Luckily someone had Narcan on hand, she was able to get medical attention, and she went to rehab right away. I’m really relieved for her, honestly, and am happy to see her doing so well a year afterwards. Demi has a new interview with Teen Vogue, her first since her hospitalization, in which she calls herself a “fighter” and speaks in general terms about her recovery. She also opens up about what body positivity means to her, and how she’s trying to come to a higher level understanding of that and not just tell herself she looks beautiful.

On body positivity vs. body acceptance
“We hear the term body positivity all the time. To be honest, I don’t always feel positive about my body. Sometimes I do not like what I see. I don’t sit there and dwell on it. I also don’t lie to myself. I used to look in the mirror if I was having a bad body image day and say ‘I love my body, you’re beautifully and wonderfully made.’ But I didn’t believe it. I don’t have to lie to myself and tell myself I have an amazing body. All I have to say is ‘I’m healthy.’ In that statement, I express gratitude. I am grateful for my strength and things I can do with my body. I am saying I’m healthy and I accept the way my body is today without changing anything.”

On being gentle with herself
“For so many years I dealt with an eating disorder. What I wasn’t ever open with myself about was, whenever I was in the gym I was doing it to an unhealthy extreme. I think that’s what led me down a darker path — I was still engaging in these behaviors. Embracing my body as it is naturally is why I took the month of October off the gym.”

On trolls getting to her
“What people don’t realize is I’m an extremely sensitive person. When someone says something mean about me or makes a meme making fun of me, I have a good sense of humor. But when it’s a very serious subject it can be hurtful. Even if you have an account thats like ‘ImaDemiFan,’ that’s the name, and you leave one comment that said ‘You look like Lord Farquaad with that hair,’ I’m like, ‘damn, that kind of sucks. I’m so tired of pretending I’m not human. When you say stuff, it affects me. I try not to look, but I see it.”

“When I’m able to see both sides [support and negativity], it pulls me out from zeroing in on the negative. But I’m human and I think that’s important to remember.”

She sees herself as a fighter.
“What I see in the mirror [is] someone that’s overcome a lot. I’ve been through a lot and I genuinely see a fighter. I don’t see a championship winner, but I see a fighter and someone who is going to continue to fight no matter what is thrown their way. I have a lot of confidence now because I have said the things I believe in. I know I can hold my own on a first date with someone, in a conversation with someone. That’s what I see when I look in the mirror — a strong woman.”

[From Teen Vogue]

I’m happy for her. I know she can be an abrasive person, but I think most of that is due to her addiction and that she’s changing. Plus I really like her music, she puts on an incredible performance and she has pipes. Demi said that she’s working on new music and wants people to think of her as a singer first, but wouldn’t give a release date, I think to give herself time and space for that. It’s interesting that she’s saying she can hold her own in a conversation, particularly on a first date. She must be thinking about that now. Demi was dating that Bachelorette contestant, Mike Johnson, but they only lasted a few weeks and broke up in October. As for her thoughts about being a fighter, that’s a good way to see yourself, as strong and able to overcome things. She was careful to say she’s not a championship winner, I think to sound less full of herself, but there’s no shame in thinking of yourself that way either.

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