The Guardian has a new interview with Joan Collins, 85. Joan is currently promoting her one-woman show and she’s also on American Horror Story. The last time I covered an interview with her was in 2015 so it’s been a while, but she makes an impression. I particularly remember a 2014 interview where she said the secret to her fifth marriage, to a man over 30 years her junior, was sex. They’ve been married since 2002 so something must be working. Joan was 45 when she started doing Dallas in 1978. She’s been around longer than you think, and she’ll tell you about it. Joan has some extremely bad takes in this interview, particularly on metoo and assaults on women and on her friendship with Piers Morgan. I’ve heard similar horrible victim-blaming takes from relatives and have argued briefly and walked away. Joan has not evolved with the times and there is no excuse for that. However I want to focus on what she said about her sister possibly visiting her as a fly. Jackie passed three years ago and I didn’t realize that she didn’t even tell Joan she had cancer.

On Jackie visiting her as a little fly
“Do you believe that little flies or butterflies or something can be old souls, people that you knew? I have this little fly that comes near me all the time. It’s really strange.”

“I think it might be my sister. I know that sounds weird, and I don’t know whether I believe in the afterlife or not,” she continues. “My opinion is still out to lunch about that, but it is weird that wherever I go, at least two or three times a week – wherever I am, France, London, here – this little fly comes. Now maybe it’s because the fruit’s rotting in the kitchen! I don’t know. But anyway… If it is: hello Jack.”

“You know, like sisters, we all have our problems, which the press loved to exacerbate, or exaggerate. But I mean, she was the closest person to me for many years and with me being the older sister she kind of worshipped me in a way.”

On Jackie not telling her she had cancer
“[She] only [told] her daughters. Thank God she didn’t tell me. I mean, I wish she had. But she didn’t want pity, and that’s what happens – in this town particularly, you know, gossip.”

[From The Guardian]

Is Joan serious about her sister or is she using that as a metaphor? We’ve heard similar things from other celebrities about their loved ones visiting them in other forms. The day my uncle passed I saw a red-bellied woodpecker in my backyard for the first time. My uncle was a bird lover, his career was in wildlife management, and I took it as a sign. I didn’t think the bird was him, but it made me think of him. Now that her incredible sister has passed (she was the queen of trashy novels, respect), Joan keeps getting visited by flies and that seems more than coincidental. I hope that my loved ones send less annoying signs to me, like a special kind of flower or some lovely animal outside that doesn’t bother me at random times. As for Jackie not telling her she had cancer, that would hurt me if a loved one kept something like that from me but it sounds like Joan understood.

photos credit: WENN

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Who among you is a Shelfer? For those who don’t know, Elf on the Shelf is a holiday tradition that originated from a kids’ book in 2005 by the same name. The idea is that the elves are ‘scout elves’ who stage a month-long home invasion between Thanksgiving and Christmas, watching and reporting back to Santa which list you belong on. They accomplish this by moving about the room, appearing on a different shelf every morning. But somewhere along the way, the Elf tradition evolved into a series of pranks in which the Elves wreak havoc on your belongings and terrorize the dog.

Jimmy Kimmel Shelfs and apparently, it helps keep his children in line. During his monologue the other night, Jimmy explained that his four-year-old daughter, Jane, believes in their Elf enough that’s she’s trying to work his endorsement by making offerings to her little brother, Billy.

Jimmy Kimmel has seen the magic of the Elf on the Shelf firsthand when it comes to making sure his own children share their toys during the Christmas season because they know the Elf is watching.

He also knows that making sure the Elf is in a new spot every day can be a chore, so the late-night host has a few hilarious suggestions on how to ease that burden.

“There needs to be a service that comes to your house and moves the Elf around for you,” he said on “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” Monday night.

Since that business doesn’t actually exist, Kimmel had one other idea that could kill two birds with one stone – cleaning the house and moving the Elf.
“Tonight I’m just gonna duct tape the Elf to a Roomba and let it move around itself,” he said.

Kimmel watched recently as his daughter, Jane, 4, shared a toy with his son, Billy, 1, all thanks to the Elf’s watchful eye.

“She gives it to him like, ‘Billy, I know this is mine, but I want you to play with it,’ and then I swear to God she did this – she turned and winked at the Elf,” he said.

[From Today]

Somebody needs to capitalize on a “Shelf Your Elf” service. I could see rich housewives in Manhattan bragging about their personal Shelfer over lunch. I’m sure the Roomba thing has been done before. I love Jane’s wink to the elf. This is where I would be with one of these interlopers in my house, I’d save all my good behavior for when I was standing in front of them. I am not a Shelfer (nor do I have any idea if that’s what they call themselves)/ I think this a fun tradition and if I had the energy, I’d do it. But since I get up between four and five in the morning, anything that requires me to stay awake past the kids is off the table. I stay away from this because I don’t want to have to think up new ideas. If you need some inspiration, check out some of these ideas people have pulled off. They are un-b-ELF-able! (See that – my elf just packed up and went back home).

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Photo credit: Getty Images and WENN Photos

Crazy Rich Asians opened in China last week and it was disappointingly not a success. For many reasons. They can watch real-life wealthy Asians being crazy with their money on Weibo every minute of every day. Remember, the story about the son of Chinese billionaire who bought two Apple watches for h…

Crazy Rich Asians opened in China last week and it was disappointingly not a success. For many reasons. They can watch real-life wealthy Asians being crazy with their money on Weibo every minute of every day. Remember, the story about the son of Chinese billionaire who bought two Apple watches for h…

Crazy Rich Asians opened in China last week and it was disappointingly not a success. For many reasons. They can watch real-life wealthy Asians being crazy with their money on Weibo every minute of every day. Remember, the story about the son of Chinese billionaire who bought two Apple watches for h…

Crazy Rich Asians opened in China last week and it was disappointingly not a success. For many reasons. They can watch real-life wealthy Asians being crazy with their money on Weibo every minute of every day. Remember, the story about the son of Chinese billionaire who bought two Apple watches for h…

Gwyneth Paltrow is featured in this month’s WSJ Magazine. As a CEO. It’s right there, on the cover: Gwyneth Paltrow, CEO. You know she loves this so much. This is where we are now. Gwyneth Paltrow, not even “former actress” but simply “CEO”. Of goop, of course, recently valuated at $250 million.

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Gwyneth Paltrow is featured in this month’s WSJ Magazine. As a CEO. It’s right there, on the cover: Gwyneth Paltrow, CEO. You know she loves this so much. This is where we are now. Gwyneth Paltrow, not even “former actress” but simply “CEO”. Of goop, of course, recently valuated at $250 million.

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Gwyneth Paltrow is featured in this month’s WSJ Magazine. As a CEO. It’s right there, on the cover: Gwyneth Paltrow, CEO. You know she loves this so much. This is where we are now. Gwyneth Paltrow, not even “former actress” but simply “CEO”. Of goop, of course, recently valuated at $250 million.

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Prince William and Catherine “hosted a party for military families at Kensington Palace” today. Here they are arriving at the event, passing along a lane with a fake snow-blower setting the scene for a winter wonderland effect.

William and Kate take the short walk from their Kensington Palc…